And so it begins. People say don't do Emerald Cup. Saying do a small show. Most are doing it as an attempt to try and help me be successful, some doing it cause...... they don't get it. I am getting the "It's to big a show", "You cant win a show like that this soon", "You are in over your head". So let us address these three statements.
1. It's to big a show: Ya damn skippy it is. BUt as previosuly stated, I would rather be dead last at a bi show than win Bob's BBQ and Bodybuilding Championships.
2. You cant win a show like that this soon: Duuuhhhh. I have no false pretences about how I will do. As I said, I don't expect to win a trophy. I win if I walk off that stage and Danny says " I am proud of you". See thats what this is about for me. I am not someone looking to be some superstar and win trophy's. To me Danny's pride is worth more than any trophy, any Pro card, and any monatary value I could win/earn. So while many consider a trophy and some celebrity from the industry standing next to you rasining your hand at the center of teh stage as winning, my winning is those five words from Danny I AM PROUD OF YOU. She says that, and I win more than whoever gets that trophy.
3. YOu are in over your head: Not really. I would be in over my head if I expected to win or place or whatever. I am not expecting that, so I am not in over my head. I have been told I cant do things all my life, and this is no different, and really I don't care what anyone things. I only care if Danny J Johnson, JT Wood, and Sara Schumann, the people I trust with my training think I can do it.
Let me ask each one of you something. That first day each of you stepped into that gym, did you say I am going to get on stage and win a trophy and become a pro? I doubt it. You went for your varius reasons. Be it to get in shape, to lose weight, to be healthy, to find an outlet, etc. Along the way you found you loved it. Then you realized you are good at it and got on stage. YOu found you loved competing and wanted to go even farther and win your Pro card. But don't forget that initial reason you stepped into the gym. I did it to lose weight. Remember I started at 292lbs (209 today). Like you, I found my passion. And who knows, once I get a taste of the stage I may end up taking the I want to do better approach, but I doubt it. I am willing to bet some of you were told you couldnt be good enough at some point, and how did you feel. So why the hell do you want to try and squash my dreams? Well you wont squash them.
Now don't get me wrong, most people support and encourage me. And I lvoe each one of you. Most of you encourage me. See, through this I ahve found my real best friends. People I want to be in my lfie forever. Really there are no better people than people in the fitness industry. Never met such supportive people. Someone messes with me I sick Megan Melone on them. I do something good, I cant wait to tell Sarah Kinney, Shirley Madera, or Belinda Hope. I am down, I can count on Eryn Strickland, Tonia Goodman, or a ton of other people. I want confirmation I belong, I send a message to Colleen Tanner, Zoa Linsey or Shannon Fredrick, and the list goes on and on. See I type this and I think "Man I am missing someone important." And thats what I am talking about. There are so many people to list, which means I ahve amde so many friends. I had to earn that, and I did. Hell, how many people yet to compete get encouragement from Jaime Eason? And I earned that friendship with these people because I have proven what I can do so far. All these friends far outnumber the few who have to be haters. Well I leanred something. If you act like a hater towards me, its really because you hate yourself.
Last thing. Something has been boiling inside me. People not qualified to give advice tryingto give it. I listed my three trainers, and they are the best. I don't need any more unless I ask for it. Often it is with the attempt to help. However, I ahve trainers, thats their job, and I must follow their advice, and often it is from unqualified people. Just like people asking me to do their diet now. I am not qualified to do that and it would be iresponsible to give such help. I can offer tips, but thats all. I was very unhappy when one person said about a recent stretch where I lost 5 pounds in 4 days "Thats not healthy, you should not be losing that kind of weight that fast, you are doing it wrong". Really? First you must not know what Danny has done with my metabolism. I have dropped like 23lbs in 4 and a half weeks. I am dropping quick. Often a spurt like 5lbs in 4 days is water weight, so it isnt even as big a deal. I eat my egiht meals a day and train twice a day, I work my ass off, and I am dropping it the right way. Now I am sure it wasn't said as an insult, and was said with concern, however it upset me because none of my trainers would elt me do anything unhealthy......EVER.
This post probably seems to some as if I am upset.....again. Really it isn't. This was about me speaking my mind and showing I am happy with who I am now, and nothing anyone says will stop that. This is my time to do something and I am going to do it. Instead of getting upset when I read a message or email from a hater, I am going to feel sorry for you, because for you to hate on someone else is a sign you hate yourself.